Attachment Parenting

By now most of us are familiar with Time magazine's cover of a mom breastfeeding her toddler.  Many of you want to know my views on this.  Thank you for asking.  I remember bringing my babies home from the hospital to a tiny home on Long Island in N.Y.  I had the cradle set up right next to my side of the bed.  I breastfed my baby as long as I wanted to (which looking back was not long enough for me.)  My husband and I decided I would be a stay at home mom as long as I wanted to, and as long as it was financially possible. Although my babies slept in a crib right next to my bed, they never, ever slept in the same bed. ( I feel very strong about not letting your babies sleep in the same bed and so does the American Academy of Pediatrics.)  This worked for my family.  I never realized that my parenting style was  "attachment parenting".  I did what came natural to me and what I thought was the right thing.  Yes...I did have pressure from working moms, and I did feel like I should be doing more to financially help out.  I especially worried about not being able to get back in the work force when the time came.  When I thought the time was right, I WAS able to get back out there. On the flip side, many working moms feel very stressed when they leave to go to work. This was 30 something years ago.  Things are different now but some things are the same.  If you are a stay at home mom or a career mom, breast feed or bottle feed, stay with your baby 24-7 or need a break on a regular basis... it is OK.  Love your babies, love your partners, and feel good about yourselves.  This is a magical (yet exhausting) time in your life.  If you are doubtful about what you doing or just want to clear some things up, contact me.  I can help make your life easier.

When Do We Stop Worrying?

I remember when my children were little and there weren't enough hours in the day, and I was pretty sure that sleep was a fantasy.  I kept thinking that it will be much easier when they are in school.  Then much easier when they drive.  Then much easier when they graduate from college and have jobs and homes of their own.  WELL...when I look back and think of all the worring I did, and all the sleepless nights I had because of the "what ifs",  it makes me question when (and if) the worrying ever ends.  When you are a parent your life changes in so many wonderful ways.  Along with that beauty and wonder comes the fears.  So here is some advice from someone who was born worried:  Do not let the "what ifs" ruin the present moment.  Every life comes with joy and sorrow.  In my experience, the hardest thing to watch is the sorrow your child is going through. (And, yes, it is our job to let them work it out on their own.)  They will probably be hurt by other kids, not make the team or get the part in a play they want, be broken hearted by a boy or girl, not get into the school they had their heart set on, and let's not even get started on jobs/careers.  If these things didn't happen, how would they know the joy of success and true love when that happens?  So when do we stop worring?  I don't think we do.  By the time we figure out that worring is USELESS, the grandchildren come along and we start all over (I think).  I am not a grandparent yet and it's probably because I haven't figured out how to stop worring.  I am getting better though so maybe there is hope...yes of course there is...I hope.  Now I'm worried about it!!! Seriously, some worrying is OK but don't let the clouds of worry cover the bright sunshine of life.  If you are having a hard time with this issue, please contact me.  I would love to give you some great tools that will help.